Subhajit

Today, I ideally should have been at one place, or to be more specific with one person. Because it is his day today.  In the last 6 years since that person has arrived in this world, I/we found it both amusing & nightmarish raising him. Though, in the real sense of it, it is the mothers who raise the kids. Fathers can complain all they want why kids are closer to their mothers, but they choose the right person, for reasons which are right too. Let's not digress.  Every year, in his birthday, we made sure all the necessary checklist is ticked off. It was difficult to celebrate 2 birthdays during lockdowns (1 during complete shutdown), but we somehow managed, more importantly he was happy with whatever little arrangements were made. I was surprised and happy seeing him not complaining. May be that's how kids are, happy with whatever they get, may be that's how we all should be. Easier said than practiced, right? 6 years have passed in a flash. I already want him to not g...

(Image Source : Google) Watching movies together have been one of three things I have been used to do since childhood with my family, other two being watching Cricket and having food. If I stretch my memories, I could go back to movies like Anari (1993). For the next several years, we four in the family used to go to a theatre on the bike ably driven by father to the nearest Ganesh Talkies in a small town in Odisha. Then the access to VCRs reduced theatre visit by family but the movie bug always remained. Then I started going to the theatre with friends. I picked all kinds of movies, but the choices were not much. Smaller movies never made it to all parts of the country in the early 2000s. But I was keen on watching the non-mainstream movies. Hence, movies like Dil Chahta, Lakshya, Swades, Rang De Basanti & Munnabhai series were few movies which was a marriage between commerce and content. Then I entered the phase where I was exposed to World Cinema (mostly English,...

(Image Courtesy : Blog at Wordpress) When I sit down to write, few times I have some abstract thoughts recollected from a local train or an auto ride or may be a second day of full moon. But rest of the times, it is just blank. The feeling of a blank mind does have two good reasons to drive me: it challenges my creative reservoir and it makes me feel like a no one. The second feeling is quite scary, more on that some other time. I received a copy of the newsletter from a bank that my f ather served for 35 years. And immediately glanced (almost proof-read it) at it thanks to my joblessness these days. And I was taken aback by the sheer amount of casual attitude towards a publication that represents a public sector bank. The layout was haywire, the editing was plain absent, the photographs are photo-shopped and looking artificial. I immediately remembered the two Newsletters that my team & I edited in my last organization. We used to take 3 different perspectives on the conten...

It’s been a different life, different few months. Months that has changed quite a few things. People ask me to describe this phase; it gives them sheer pleasure to indulge in such quiz for they know any answer would excite them. Sometimes the no. of questions are infinite if you allow yourself. There has been more than one instances where I have had close acquaintances with few where each of them came with a conclusion written or decided in between. Had my share of luck, love & happiness long way back, for quite a long time. Somewhere I couldn't muster the courage, interest & invest time for something ‘that’ serious after that era was over. I could not seize certain moments, I could not take that one extra step, I could not let go of my inhibitions. But past is past, no looking back, no regrets. But I have lived a lifetime with nostalgia. It is something that moves with me, it’s something I live with. I love it & hate it. All at the same time. Deep inside, there...

They say marriages are made in heaven! But nobody ever thought where divorces came from! I have seen and been with many girls in my life, each having their individual place in my heart. They all have their unique identities. And I have been transparent enough with each of them about the feelings I share. The best part is they know each other; it has been only possible when you are true to yourself and with the person in front. Life has moved on a lot since my first love. Loved many, few loved me back…. But today I still stand officially single. With no instant plans to get into the marriage-thing. I love being a single; it has got its own benefits and drawbacks as well. Finding love, being in love and marrying are three different things, realized it later, but a good realization. I met different people at different stages of my life. Each came with their priorities, preferences and expectations. They are still there, quite in touch. They have been a part of my life and wil...

Sab ka khushi se faasla ek kadam hai, har ghar mein bas ek hi kamra kam hai... Early teen age is not a good time to take important calls in life. Added to that, a bunch of crazy morons surrounding you with all sorts of inputs. To this mix, you add doting parents. And then a critical phase of studies. In between all these, the ever increasing love for the newly arrived MP3s n video games. With the freedom of getting into college and getting rid of the regular uniforms, the heart was pumping than the required speed. This early teen age you know! Now leave all these. Enters a damsel! Year 1 and 2... Kya kehke gaya tha shayar woh sayana, aag ka dariya doobke jaana... Now what... Nothing, the game's over! They say enter a girl and your life will never be the same again. The guy never believed it, still don't too. But his results for next couple of years supported the argument. Studies were at an all time low, parents were big time upset, neighbors were at their s...

Actually I was kind of used to it. I was used to the everyday pain, complications and people around me going through a range of emotions. It was not just a day or two that it was happening. It was happening since a long time, some ten odd months is actually not a long time. But it seemed to be. It is the suffering that made simple things look so complicated, it made the entire process so tiresome, it basically made the days longer than they actually were. Life was not the same anymore. The family had to stay calm; they knew it was inevitable with each passing day. But who wants to accept certain truths of life and just move on. Practically, it was impossible. At the same time it was also impossible to accept what was waiting. I was just a passive observer throughout. Expressionless, as usual. Life has told me once again to stop expecting. I never had actually, but when things go beyond our control, we become terribly submissive. To a point where, even the Gods/Goddesses feel that we a...

Well, this post is not the result of anything that has happened a week back. My 6 years stay. 3 such moronic acts. That’s like once every 2 years. Now no one is immune to it, but we all have become used to it. We are used to it so much that it’s just like any other thing that keeps happening. These have become like either a pre-diwali or a post-diwali event for a group of people. I will again reiterate that I am no way influenced with the last event that happened, but yes, I am just sick of the events happened throughout the last decade or so. It starts right from the top, Kashmir, to every part of the country. Today we have no identity of terror unlike few years back when we very proudly used to discuss about a particular community or religion. Let’s not give terror the colour of green, saffron or white. That’s irrelevant. The best part with us is that we are so used to all these that we tend to forget everything next morning. Else, when India wins a Cricket match or we see a masala...

  June '06 June was ending. The train slowed down as it was approaching the final destination after a 37 hour journey. It was drizzling outside. Reached a place called Belapur after one more hour travel. It was windy & pouring outside. Got down and headed for Kharghar to find my new college and the hostel. Clueless about almost everything apart from just one thing. Rains. It was simply all over. My first glance from the auto rickshaw of my new place for study was a great feeling. Throughout dad's stay for three and half days, it kept on raining. We both did not like it, did not dislike as well.  November '07 The noise in the hostel was dying. Placements started. Rains were almost over. But I remember those quiet nights with the sound of rains falling on the empty plain spaces of Kharghar. The sound of it, the smell and the feeling is beyond words. The feeling of batch-mates leaving each other after two years, the hostel & the college, everything summed up in thos...

     A lmost after 2 quiet and lonely days, today's Sunday. Sundays becomes nostalgic if you are not inside a bloody mall and shopping. Being bachelor has all these pros and cons attached to it. But it's a tag that I still like next to my name, atleast till the time I can push the inevitable ;) Over last few years in the corporates, I realized few things which always were my mental blocks. Became less emotional for the employees, started understanding situations from different perspectives, taking everyone around you into confidence and being simple in whatever I want to execute or implement. I always knew that everything that the B-school taught me can not be practiced in the real world but still tried my own things by covering some of those theories with my ideas. Few of them clicked, some did not and some got discarded instantly by bosses. So, with every passing month or year, I am experiencing new dimensions of looking and doing the same thing...

After long getting some time for yourself is really a welcome change. Amongst all the mismatched schedule and last minute no-shows the soothing sound of unending waves are more than enough to take you to an introspective ride. So I went to so many such rides and it really made up for my lost water rides due to bad health. Goa, has its own charm and it lies in its sheer small little things. Be it the old-styled homes, simple people, narrowest possible roads, no-rush-to-modern ethos in every corner. Life goes for a sudden break and throws you to the relaxed seat. You start noticing these tiny little things of life and relish it again and again. Such places makes me tell myself that I can still be the same person without so many things I feel is essential for life. I, as a person, keep a low profile for many reasons and it works. Off late, this status of mine has been tampered by people as well as by me in some cases. But a sharp SWOT analysis has given me the result that I could still...

November will be over in next few days. Rains still holding their fort with drizzles here & there. Rajnikant SMSs are doing the rounds and I am still getting late to office. Today the nation remembers ‘another’ dreadful day we gone through 2 years before in Mumbai & that crook is still getting fed in our jail. Today, one of my current company’s most ambitious and fast growing business format completes 3 years as well. Even it tops in attrition amongst the other divisions, all a part & parcel of the business. Today, also the shraadh of my grandfather. A great principled man, who ‘lived’. After repeated denials by my father regarding my ambitious business projects (I go with a new proposal & a concept, each time I go home), I decided to concentrate fully on the job front. Still that longing for home kills me inside even when I (almost) get raped inside a local train almost every morning or eat that crappy sandwich in the lunch. Home’s home, come what may. My friend lost ...

Day-1… The process starts. We knew it for a week now. Employees came to know about it today. It’s tough, real tough for them. Handling them is tougher even. HR at the job. Did something like this last year, but this year it is too damn hard. It involves all of us.Our COO broke the news to all the employees today. He himself is associated with this firm since inception, in fact he gave the name it has today to this company. Day is ending and just broke the news to the night shift employees as well. 16 th June, 8:53 PM. 27 Pints of beer & 4 pegs of scotch was necessary to sleep tonight… 2:12 AM Day-2… Today is official day-2. HR team knew this a week back including me. Tried all possible options but nothing worked out. Problem is the top management sitting in US does not understand/look at the vision we all have/had. For them, it’s all about numbers, as businessmen it is correct though. We all worked with one thing, sheer passion. Now we are thinking the worth of it! Posit...